it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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