I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I smell like Dick and happiness
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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