I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Randomize
