I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
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