so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize