she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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