I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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