I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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