She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
