areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
