After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
