spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize