so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You ruined the universe
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