I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
