we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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