I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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