your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
