He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
