in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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