Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
