...so i touched it.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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