What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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