Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
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Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
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The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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