Well douche your snatch and let's go!
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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