Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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