yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
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Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
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We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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