The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
