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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  "omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Holy shit r u serious? How?

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  "The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"

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• (713): View more from Texas

  I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...

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• (+27): View more from South Africa

  He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.

  Fav 1 876 576

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me

  Fav 1 649 402

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?

  Fav 3 540 284

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• (760): View more from California

  I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy

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• (516): View more from New York

  He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  100000% expect a picture of my ass in them

  Fav 0 64 14

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