Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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