I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
