just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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