every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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