It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize