Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize