I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize