ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
