I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
