how can u be prego again
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize