And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
