I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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