what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
