I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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