if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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