felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
PS: I just woke up from my shower
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
