She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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