I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
