please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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