We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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