i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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