can u get pink eye on your cock?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
